Why it's so difficult to run events - And why we could use your help.
Updated: Feb 7
We were spoiled, and it's a problem. Fetish After Dark was started at a dive-bar in West Greensboro owned by two brothers who were extremely accepting of our community. They trusted us to bring in a crowd of ethical kinksters and our community delivered (for which we are eternally grateful). Because our nights were so easy and calm, they gave us a tremendous amount of latitude to be able to modify the space to our needs, bring in additional lighting and equipment, and set the theme of every night. We never had to beg to get permission for an event because the owners trusted that it would be awesome.
We realized a sad reality after that venue closed: most event spaces see the BDSM crowd as a risk. We find it funny that the same venues who will host a metal show where the cops are repeatedly called for violence in their parking lot are the same venue who see a bunch of kinky people having a bar-night as a threat. We have shown every venue we've had that our people are respectful, conscious of the space, try to keep it clean, tip well, and show up. Basically, we're a large group of paying customers who buy a lot and leave the place nicer than we found it.
However, despite proving that to a variety of venue owners, the disrespect and mistrust still exist.
Thus, we come to a crossroads. We desperately want to bring back Fetish After Dark's monthly public events. However, we are having a hard time finding a space that meets our needs and is willing to work with us. We would love a bar where we can have a mass of 18+ people once a month for free with out own music, playspace, and everything.
But to have the event, it's looking like some changes might need to be made. A lot of venues would force us to take a cover charge to be able to pay the venue and make up our expenses. Many bars want the event to only be 21+, which would exclude many of the college people who have been able to safely watch or explore at our events. Some don't like that we have a legal waiver, while others want us to pay for reservations months in advance.
So, we're putting it to the community. Do YOU have a connection to an event space where you could pull some strings? Do you have any places that would like to have us in the Greensboro area? We're open to suggestions and would love to build a long term relationship of trust and mutual financial benefit. If you've got something, shoot us an email here or on FetLife.
But, unfortunately, we believe that things will probably not be as nice as they once were. We had it so good.